OUTFIT Is An Appropriate Word!

WOW! 1 week until I leave for Fitness Ridge! I can't believe how fast the last 2 months have flown by. I went through my nervous stage, but now I am SUPER excited! I am soo happy that I am finally going to feel good again!

Since booking my trip, I have actually found myself in a better place mentally :) The words and blogs of the others that are, or have been there have given me such high expectations of coming out of the experience in a more confidant and happy state of mind :)

It hit me how long I am going to be gone for.. I was packing my stuff up and my son got upset which in turn started my own waterworks :( Saturday morning is going to be very difficult. I am going to miss my son, my boyfriend, family and friends so much. There are no words to express how much I appreciate them all.

I have learned to laugh at myself. My closet is full of outfits that do not fit. (hence the title of this posting) I decided to pick one and take a picture of me in it so that I can compare how it fits when I am done my 4 weeks at FR. I picked a pair of jeans that fit well a year ago, then slightly tight last spring, then so tight in the summer that although I could get them done up, my internal organs were in extreme danger and I dare not sit down due to the risk of splitting the back of them..lol. (that was the point that I gave in and bought the next size up. My original plan was to wear the larger jeans just TEMPORARILY while I worked my way back into fitting the other pair) The lst time I can remember fitting the shirt that I chose would be a year ago October. It had already started to become too tight then, but I could button the whole thing up and not too much hung out..lol.

So there I was standing in my closet about to put said outfit on...I stepped a foot into one pant leg, then the other... I proceeded to pull the jeans up to my hips where they stopped and refused to go any higher.. Suddenly it hit me just how much weight I had really gained. I guess when I bought the larger jeans it made my brain forget that I had outgrown the smaller ones and not attempt to lose anything at all! I managed to get the suckers over my hips by using extreme force. I for some reason attempted to do up that poor frightened little button on the front which to my dismay wouldn't even come within 6" of the button hole. WOW its funny how fast those nasty little fat cells multiply on you!

On to the shirt... I managed to get my arms in easily (thank goodness its a stretchy material!) Then came the buttons... I managed to get two of them to meet up with their partners on the other side.. the other ones would not cooperate! Apparently my breasts have taken a large brunt of the weight gain, along with my stomach because neither of them were willing to stay in the shirt where they belonged.LOL!

Normally something like this would have sent me into a momentary depression complete with tears and rage and self loathing, but this time was different for some reason. I set the timer on my camera, ran to get into position and waited for my close-up. The flash goes, I run back to the camera and hit the little view button and just started laughing. I looked so ridiculous I couldn't help but crack up. I think if I didn't have FR coming up in a week I probably would have cried, but all I could do was laugh!!

I never in a million years thought the outfit would be that much to small, but it is.. It will definitely cause me to push myself that much harder during my time in Utah. I don't think it'll be possible to have the outfit fitting perfectly in 4 weeks, but I'm definitely going to try! Oh yeah, I'm going to attach the picture in all of its hilarity!

7 MORE DAYS!!!